Drag Shows and Other Sillinesses

I do not make a pretty woman. (But, really, who does?)

That said, I have a shit ton of fun. My motto, stolen from Succio Sanchez, is: If you aren't walking off stage sweating and out of breath, you haven't done your job. 

Unlike our darling co-contributer, Penny Tration, I do not make my name off my drag alter-ego. I am not famous for my persona as Kristy Kay Karolina; I have only ever been paid $25 to perform and that was years ago. Most days, I curse the day I decided to ever step into a dress. It's alternatively exhausting and exhilerating, and the ups and downs of performing are more stress than I need to add to my life.

But I do it on occasion, and it's always on my time, when I want to. I have to balance the "do I have time to shave" question with the "what am I doing the next morning" question with the "do I really want to stumble around in heels all night" question. All of them are equally important considerations. The last thing you need is to be out in 5 inch stilettos, half shaven and drunk, when you have to be up at 6am the next morning to do that annoying thing we refer to ask "work."

Additionally, there is the question of with whom you will be performing. Trust me, it's a big deal. Back room politics are neither fun nor conducive to a good show. If you can't perform with friends, then you're just performing for a handful of friends in the audience and it's hardly enough to make you feel like you're part of something. And I'm not pretty or gifted enough to stir a crowd to love me in a town saturated with drag and "booger queens." 

When the opportunity, then, came up to perform with three of my best drag friends, I had to jump at the chance.

See, there are drag queens I respect. Penny Tration is one of my favorite, and I consider myself lucky to consider her a friend. She has shown me how to be energetic and creative without losing your spice. Truly Scrumptious, my drag mother, and her constant companion, Roberta Bigg, have given me both my drag career and a sense of showmanship that I could have found no where else. The Black Mondays have spurred my imagination and made me see why I love to perform. These are the people I look up to; these are the people that I view as the replicable fashion leaders in the city. Sure, there are so many more, but, in my heart, these are the ones that, if given the opportunity, I would like to be on par with.

But I don't spend that much time on my look or on my act, nor do I have the natural talent to pull it off.

On Friday, May 29th, at Shooter's, at approximately 11pm, I will be performing with three queens that I love and hold dearer to my person than almost anyone in the world. Though none of us are truly huge names in the city, we have our own following and we have our own sense. Dixie Crystals, Vivica LaCroix, and Whitney Sierra-Devine have taught me how to not only be a better queen, but a better person, and I am honored to share the stage with them.

That Friday, I will be getting out of class and cursing each of their name as I rub Nair and a straight razor over my body in a vain attempt to pretend that there is some resemblance to a woman in my appearance. As I lace up the knee high boots, or get buckled into the corset (both stolen from Vivica), I will be hating on them with curse words not appropriate even for this blog. When Viv start the hour long or more process of painting my face, I will cuss and squeal and want to slap a bitch. 

When I walk into the backroom at Shooter's, and Dixie inevitably offers me a shot of whatever (her poison is -- gulp -- tequila, whilst I go for the girlier shots), I will throw my bag down in frustration, cuss some more at the sheer hatred of the art and sport of drag, take my drink, and say: "Okay, bitches, Mama's ready to go." And for the rest of the night, I will smile and make light of the situation and flirt and dance and drag stomp all over the bar in a fierce imitation of those I respect, in a fierce sisterhood of those that I love. 

I'm going to tell you that I hate every minute of it; but I'll say it with a smile and I'll probably do it again.

Join us -- Friday May 29th at 11:00pm-ish at Shooter's on the corner of Court and Race -- and I'll show you just how much I'm hating life that night. :-) 

All money, btw, goes to the charities of the Court. Bring your dollars!

College Drag Show Follow-Ups

Your NKU hostess, Kamron Vaughn


Your Miami hostesses, Kristy Kay Karolina (me!) and Vivica LaCroix
The two drag shows this weekend -- NKU and Miami University -- have finally announced their tallies. *drum roll please*

NKU -- over $500 for GLSEN and the National Kidney Foundation (via Phi Sigma Sigma Foundation)

Miami -- over $1600 for the American Cancer Society, in honor of Doug Feld

Congratulations to both shows!

COMMUNITY EVENTS: College Drag Shows

Two are coming up that I know of -- I think I missed one back there somewhere, too (UC?). Give me a heads up if your college/university is having a drag show or similar event so that we can get the word out.



NKU will be hosting a drag show! From their Facebook event:

This Semesters Drag Show is going to be amazing not only is this going to be a fun event, its also going to raise money for two great causes and it is also an educational event. This is something you wont want to miss. we are very excited to have the panhellenic council backing us up this semester.

$2 donation will be taken at the door to enter

It will be on campus -- at the U.C. (University Center) -- from 7:00pm until 9:00pm on Friday April 17th.

---

Miami University's show returns for the fourth show of the season! This show, which began almost 6 years ago, has four shows a school year and regularly raises upwards of $10,000 a season for charity. The show will show off the talent of predominately local queens -- including the rising star in Cincinnati known as Vivica LaCroix, as well as the return of Anita Sativa ... and, of course, yours truly (Kristy Kay Karolina). It will be on Friday, April 17th from 10:30pm onwards at the Balcony Bar in Uptown Oxford. The money raised will be going to the American Cancer Society in honor of Doug Feld, long time friend of the show.

Check out their Facebook event, as well.

--
I'm actually kinda pissed they are on the same night -- there are those of us who would like to go to both. It would actually be technically possible to do both by going to the NKU hsow and then arriving at the MU bar by 10:30pm in time for the next show to start.

But, I suppose they aren't going after the same crowd and are mostly localized events.

If I'm great...

...it's because these people are in my life.

In my head, I imagine that all of you are wondering: well, Mr. Barry, if you're VD was so great, what made it so great? I'm glad you asked, because I'll be happy to tell you.

I woke up at 3am, because that's how I roll, to a phone call from a boy I met at the bar two weeks ago who proceeded to wonder, alloud, just how long ago we had met at Shooter's. Once he figured out who I was, and I figured out who he was, the conversation ended shortly with him saying, "Well, I'm going to bed," and a vague promise to respond if I texted him later with plans. Weird.

...to be followed by someone saying they were attracted to me online. Also weird. (I am also attracted to them, but I wonder if it will go anywhere, but there are other issues, no doubt.)

Blah. Made it through the day going stir crazy in my house, when study buddy Michelle picks me up for lunch and, well, studying. We had a ball, I learned everything possible about diabetes, and we moved on with our life. She put up with my insanity for a little while, and that's a great kindness on her part because I think I was mild cabin fevered.

I was all too itchy to leave again once I got home, got on the way early bus to head up to the reopening of Take the Cake, which I had promised @geekjames I would make an appearance at, and where I would be meeting darling @jddalton (I swear, stop changing your twitter name). Take the Cake was fabulous, and the party was hopping. Lots of great Northside folks, lots of amazing food laid out, lots of tasty treats for everyone. After I made a complete ass out of myself and introduced myself to @geekjames' partner (the actual baker), whom I thought was my twitter buddy, I settled in which some fabulous chocolates and deserts. I also learned that I'm not a big fan of dates. That's neither here nor there.

Definitely worth stopping in -- apparently they'll be changing their menu on a daily basis. Very chic. And it's a bakery! C'mon!

Note: This is why I don't do restaurant reviews.

Then we went onto New Stage Collective...

Maybe I wasn't smart enough to get Dead City, but it says something when I start dozing off midway through. It is the play you expect to see at an avant garde theatre -- brilliantly acted and completely unreadable. Not a big fan of esoteric art, really, as I think there should be something there to be understood for everyone. Despite the amazing work of the actors and actually really amazing blocking -- and a few times when it was funny -- it was theatre for the few, not theatre for the masses.

I don't know, maybe it's more in your taste than mine. Tom told me You'll get it later. Well, I could also get an STD later, but that doesn't mean I'm going to spend the time. 

Wow, that was a "bad review." I feel really guilty.

Then @jddalton and I headed down to Below Zero for some cocktails, where our crew grew from him, me, and Queen City Survey, to just him and me, then to himmeandAndrew, then himmeAndrewandAmyandhusband, then himmeAndrewAmyhusbandandVivica (you know how it goes). We had a blast. I even invited the boy who had called me at 3am to join us, but then sat off by himself on the pretense that "I don't want to intrude." Whatever. Off the list of interesting people, on the list of creepy people. We even tried to convince Julie and Katy out, but they were tucked in for their Valentine's Day.

So by the time we reached Shooter's, we were all quite tipsy (BZ was clearing out).

Me and Jeffery!

Blogger photo -- god I'm a nerd

...at Shooter's I met a cute boy who loves Jesus -- we all have our faults :-) j/k -- who had informed me that darling Joe Penno has left even the Pride Committee (what happened to him?). 

I got home somehow, but not after a quick rendez-vous with the cute boy from Shooter's.

And I tucked into bed, where I woke up the next morning in the same clothes I went out the night before.

Overall, the best Valentine's Day to date.

Thanks :-). You guys made it awesome.

On having sex with straight men (Rainbow Cinci post)

New post over at Rainbow Cincinnati, this time entitled On having sex with straight men... which I'm sure will be of great interest to all of my dear gay readers.

Your preview:

A few months ago, Vivica (drag name) called me and, with purses falling out of her mouth, she squealed, "I had sex with a straight guy!"

"Yea? When? Where is he?" I responded.

"Right here, playing Halo!"

Uh-huh.

Just this past weekend, darling Katy of Kate's Random's Musings was driving me home from our meet-up when she turned to me and asked: What percentage of straight men have sex with other men?

Do you want the official stats or personal experiences?

I'm here to tell you, ladies, it's a lot of them. And in this, your best gay girlfriend is not going to be your best friend. (click here for the full version) (click here for the QueerCincinnati column archive)

Darren also updated his blog!!!! Don't forget to check it out, as well as all the rest of the excellent content over there by clicking on the picture below :

CINCY GAY SCENE: Rumors abounding...

I didn't have my camera for this weekend, but a quick snapshot: crazy drunk in Columbus with KH on Friday night, including hanging out with a really really hot underwear model... Union Cafe was my bar when it was here in town, I now have a small circle of "favorites" there that includes Union.

Woof's, btw, SUCKED. Hated it. Lot of bears just hanging out staring at each other. We were after hot muscle leather daddies. None there to report of.

After a trip to the impound lot, came back to Cincy and went out with kids. That was fun. Bronz, Bullfishes, Adonis.

The Bronz show sucked, I'm sorry to say, even though the Black Mondays were in it. It was sad. Bullfishes was awesome as we gear up for Kristy and Vivica to host the first drag show there since it opened on August 15th (check out the Facebook invite here) And Adonis... well, I kinda love Adonis though it cost me and Tim $20 to get in... grrr...

But the big news of the night...

It's true. The Serpent, for now, has banned sexual activity in the bar. Rumor has it that there has been a bit of a crack down in the city on this kind of thing -- thanks, Simon Leis -- and Anthony has banned any hanky panky in his bar. It makes me kind of sad, but is anyone surprised? I mean, jesus, the crowd of men around pool table was almost obscenely in you face at times. Not that I haven't been found there sometimes, I just can't believe it's been going on as long as it has. (I mean, I was tied to a cross and bullwhipped at 19 there...). They've also started carding at the bar.

So something has happened, and John from BronZ made this comment: The lights were on and people were actually playing pool!

LOL. I know, I'm shocked too.

CINCY GAY SCENE: Dayton Gay Pride and other jazz

Bagel was up this weekend -- LOVE YOU MUCH BABY -- although she told me that she doesn't really read and thinks I'm funny for blogging. We had a GREAT time:

1) First time eating at Universal Grill since it became Universal Grille. We had a great bartender/server (I think his name was Sam), who is a recent transplant from SC. He was charming and on top of our needs. Food was not much different than we got used to at HM... so, not much new to report there. It was my first burger in a while, and that was far more exciting than the food that we were being served. It is, as usual, up-scale bar food. There is a sign saying they are opening for lunch these days, but it doesn't appear that they have yet.



Universal Grille -- from my camera phone.









2) Went out to see Vivica LaCroix, one of my dear friend performers from Oxford, perform this weekend at Shooter's. She made an OK first performance in Cincinnati, but it was nice to be surrounded by hot men that night (Edro, Chris, QCS, Matt, etc etc etc) although I somehow managed to get a lot drunker than I meant to. Gr. Oh well. We went to the Dock afterwards. You know how THAT goes.


Vivica LaCroix and Truly Scrumptious.








3) Dayton gay pride. I guess it's a lesson in appreciation for what we do have here in Cincinnati. Lame, lame, lame. The parade was short (less than 20 minutes!) and there was simply nothing to do. In fairness, it was raining, so I'm sure a lot of people didn't come, but that doesn't excuse.

This is the first pride I've been to, really, that I haven't been intimately acquainted with in someway. I just wanted to go to go. And there wasn't a damned thing to do. Like Cincinnati's, you watch the parade, you walk around the park, listen to a couple things on stage, and go to a bar. It was a nice venue, overall, but I think there should be carnival games.

Writing that, I guess I kinda made a small realization: local gay prides, like Cincy or Toledo or Dayton or SC or anything like that, are about the local community. They know they don't attract a lot of out of towners, so the focus is exclusively on the city itself. That's wonderful and great, but there needs to be something for us non-locals to appreciate rather than the ongoing glorification of self and city.

IE: Use the opportunity to show off your gay scene, what's special about it. So my day in pictures...





























In order:

a) Beginning of the Parade on the corner of St. Clair and Third.

b) A little hometown activism.

c) Cincinnati representing! It was comforting to hear that they seemed to share a lot of the same feelings about the situation that I did... that we appreciate what we do have here in town. This was the first, time, btw, that the Cincy LGBT Center "marched" in this parade.

d) Cincinnati's Queen City Rainbow Band!!! Yea! Bagel's comment: You have a gay marching band? Ha! Yes! They aren't the best band in the world, but they are fun and I love that they exist.

e) Club Masque and their Super-Limo

f) A LOT of gayness.

g) Hell, yea old lesbians!!!!

h) "Do drag queens melt in the rain?" The answer is no, but they dance to bad music (Mariah Carey, I still hold, has lost her damned mind)

i) Judge Wiseman -- the first openly gay elected official in Ohio, and the first openly gay appointed official in Ohio. She's up for re-election as the Montgomery County Judge. We got to meet her and she is amazing. I asked her opinion on gay marriage, her response: "Well, I'm gay and I'm married. Does that answer your question?" No, actually, it doesn't, but it's close enough that all I could feel was: I wish I could vote for this woman. She is amazing, folks. Vote for her.

j) gohi!!! The Gay Ohio History Initiative! Look, it does exist! They report that they are getting things off to a start and their first display -- LGBT historical figures in Ohio -- is going up soon and their newsletter will begin soon!

k) Duh. Half naked boy. Funny story: his underwear was stuffed. I'm convinced of that.

l) The line for the beer tickets. For people who have never done this: you have to show your ID, get a wristband, and buy tickets to walk to the next booth and get your beer (1 ticket-1 beer-$3). It's really annoying if you're a participant, but, from an organizational standpoint, it's ideal. As few people as possible with their hands on the money makes for an honest day.

m) Courthouse square where the festival was. And yes, there were boys in the fountain at one point.

n & o) MJ's! The bar we went to after words. The bartender was AWESOME! And we had a really good time there, but we were hungover, tired, and couldn't stick around for their free BBQ that afternoon :-(.

4) After a nap Saturday afternoon, Bagel and I went, at Queen City Survey's suggestion, to see Sound of Music at Fountain Square. I got to see cutie-patootie Dan again :-), and I also briefly saw Bruce, former editor of the local gay rag.

However, about five minutes into the movie, I realized I had never seen the whole movie straight through, and I really enjoyed it! It was a beautiful night with Graeter's Ice Cream, a couple beers, and it was BUSY. I just sat there and watched hundreds of people wandering downtown. It's true... downtown is getting busy again, and it's wonderful. Thanks for the invitation out, QCS.





Sun setting behind the Great American Life Insurance Building -- via my camera phone.









It was a good gay weekend. I'm now debating whether or not to go to the Drag Races. I'm sure I'll end up down there, but we'll see.

CINCY GAY SCENE: This coming weekend...

There are three huge things going on this weekend, so I thought I'd give the heads up:

1) Vivica LaCroix comes to Cincinnati (from Oxford)! She'll be performing at Shooter's at 11:30pm with my own drag mother, Truly Scrumptious.



2) Dayton Pride is Saturday, which should be an interesting new experience! However, I have never heard anything about Dayton Pride, so how big it is and what goes on... well, I guess we'll see! Although they Margaret Cho last year, which was a huge coup.

3) Cincinnati Drag Races are this Sunday. I have usually been disappointed with this particular event in Prides in the past, but I'm going to keep my mind open for this one because it looks like there's been some time put into, at least, the website. However, I've not heard much buzz, so we'll see how it all turns out, yes? The website also lists off some really fun parties going on!

Anyways, that's where you can catch me this weekend!

CINCY GAY SCENE: Coco Bliss comes to Cincy

One of Oxford's BEST performers, Coco Bliss, arrived at On Broadway this evening, which coincided with a fierce birthday celebration we had for Vivica LaCroix (another Oxford performer).

Quick rundown:

1) On Broadway was a little slow, though Brooklyn Steele-Tate maintains her rightful place as one of the best hostesses in town. Yves St. Michael from Lexington has some fierce outfits and a great southern drawl, but I think the little tiny stage at OB's scared her. Coco, of course, was fierce. Saw Santana Storm, who informed me she works weekends now so we won't see as much of her. Miss you baby.














Brooklyn spanking a birthday boy. Mama had to lose her hair and earrings.

2) Ended up at the Dock, the dirty dirty Dock :-) that we all love. Jessica Dimon and Bella Dolce finishing one of their famously long shows -- ended at 1:30? cut it short, girls we want to DANCE -- and I don't think a group number to Seasons of Love is the best way to end a show. But Jessica is always amazing, and everyone should vote for her on RuPaul's drag show, Drag Race, so that she can be seen by millions. Caught Bella after the show; we swapped phone losing stories, but it was nice to see her. Best part: seeing Mykey back behind the bar. Oh, and I saw Cassandra Mills-Best, my local fav performer, out of drag and she gave me the run down on her FIERCE schedule all over the midwest, which makes me very happy for her.














End of the Dock show. Does it seem like even Friday nights at the Dock are slow these days?

3) No alcohol -- lots of Red Bull, so I'm awake. But there is a boy sleeping in my bed upstairs. This is my version of whispering in the phone in the closet.














Queer Cincinnati, the Vinyl Polis, and Vivica LaCroix, out of drag. Don't kill me, darling!














The fierce Coco Bliss.

PS Catch Viv's first performance in Cincinnati this Friday with Truly Scrumptious at Shooter's at 11pm-ish.

CINCY GAY SCENE: Oxford, Season 5, Ends

April 11th, 2008 saw the end of the fifth season of the Oxford show. I started this crazy shit five years ago, above and beyond the better judgment of my organization (Spectrum), and it's grown into this crazy exciting and wonderful thing that now involves so many talented and wonderful people, some of whom I fight with and some of whom do my bidding. :-) But somehow, we manage to pull off an amazing show that makes everyone happy and ends up being one of the best things going in town -- and one of the few things I know for sure I've done right in my life.

We raised $2500 for Equality Ohio's educational PAC, via the ISQCCBE!!!!! Guess what? That means we raised over $10,000 for charity in this season!!!! That's huge!!!!

Thank you to everyone for all the support! And thanks to everyone who came to see it, and especially thanks to everyone who performed. All -- all -- of you are amazing!

And now for some pictures!

First of all, welcome to our newest members of the House of O (our own local sisterhood)?:










Brooklyn Steele Tate, Roman Hands, Coco Bliss (Hernandez?), Vivica LaCroix, and Misty Riviera
And to our beautiful and wonderful performers:









That's Buster Hymen, Ben Dover, Clitty McPhearson, Vivica LaCroix (that bitch is so fierce...), Roxy Monroe (in her first performance!!!), Mistress Toinette (in her first performance!!!!), Coco Bliss, Princess P. Cock (in her first performance!!), Spreads McLoven (in his first performance!!!), Jazmine Delicious, Davey Cockett, Anita Sativa, Dick Zenya, and Tyese Reinz (in her first time on the Oxford stage)! (Not pictured: first time perfomer "Hot Rod" Remington)
And, of course...















Kristy Kay Karolina (that's me! :-))

Thanks to all who came out and support and showed their love! *MUAH* MAMA LOVES YOU ALL!!!!!

(And join us at Balcony Bar next year for season six)

CINCY GAY SCENE: Follow up to Oxford Show

People who do not have access to Facebook or Myspace have requested I post some pictures here of the most recent Oxford Show... HERE YA GO!!!!

Kristy Kay Karolina and Davey Cockett, both of the House of "O"


Davey Cockett, Mr. Magical Makeover 2008

Roman Hands

Coco Bliss, Kristy Kay Karolina, and 21st Birthday Girl (we spank -- and I will even teach you how on YouTube)

Anita Sativa, House of "O"

Kristy Kay Karolina

Clitty McPhearson -- first performance

Vivica LaCroix

Buster Hymen -- first performance

Jazmine Delicious, House of "O"

Dick Zenya, House of "O"

Kristy Kay Karolina

Kristy Kay Karolina in her favorite pose

Again, we raised $2500 for the Cincinnati chapter of PFLAG via the ISQCCBE. Thanks to all!!!