Grand Theft Auto IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony

You are reading that right, kids.

Cnet.com is reporting that the fourth installment of the hugely popular Grand Theft Auto series is including a major gay character. We find our "hero" working for "Gay Tony," a high-end nightclub owner who moves us into a much different world than GTA fans will remember. This time, it's much more expensive... but don't worry, I'm sure the beatings, murders, robberies, car thefts, and purchasing of hookers will all remain the same.

A blogger over at the Inquirer had this to say:

Obviously your player will be straight but your boss is gay.

Quite how this will effect game play is not certain. It is unlikely that you will have to crash into a crack den and redecorate it with furniture from IKEA. It does mean that people with shaved heads will be a bit more kinder and the phrase "Take out Scarface" will probably mean going to a nice wine bar somewhere.

In some ways it is telling the world that people who come out of the closet can be mindless violent psychopaths like the rest of us.

I mean, that's not exactly the point of the movement, but, ok... I'm struck between a desire to be insulted by those statements and amused -- after all, they're things I think I would say. It's a strange but nice way to see progress, though, and I think it will, perhaps unexpectedly, alter a few minds for the gamers of the world.

For the record, I am totally a closet gamer, but not games like GTA -- I totally got left behind after the demise of the SNES and the release of the N64. I'm not into shoot-em-up's... I prefer games with bright, full colors, round edges, and cartoon-ish qualities. So... yea. I, basically, like Mario. My favorite game? Super Smash Brothers. I'm waiting until someone gets the hint about how much I want a Wii and buys me it and Super Smash Brothers Melee...

... because I have time for such things.