STUPID JOKE SATURDAY!!!

Happy Saturday everyone!!!!! :-)

What do you get when you put a bomb under a cow?
Udder destruction!

How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it.

Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
They taste funny.

Two peanuts were walking through Central Park. One was assaulted.

What do you call a boomarang that doesnt come back when you throw it?
A stick.

Q: How many kids with 'ADD' does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Wanna go ride bikes?

What's green and looks like a bucket?
A green bucket!

Why was the archeologist depressed?
Because his career was in ruins!

A bulky young man goes into a bar with a salamander on his shoulder. The barman looks at the creature and asks the man what he calls it.
"Tiny" replies the man.
"Why's that?" asks the bartender.
"Because, he's MY salamander!"

What kind of key opens a banana?
A monkey.

Did you hear that a boat carrying red paint and a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other?
Apparently the crew were marooned.

Pessimist: Things are horrible. Everything is falling apart. Things can't get any worse.
Optimist: Yes they can!

Did you know that five out of three people have trouble with fractions?

What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Roamin' Catholic.

Famous last words of a mafia hit man: "Who put a violin in the violin case?"

A duck walks into a pharmacy and says, "Give me some chap stick and put it on my bill."

Where do you find a turtle with no legs?
Right where you left it.

If they were good jokes, I'd say it was GOOD joke Saturday.